Still sniffing in his sleep

Hey Memo

How are you "Hanging in"????
I used to be impatient, and the only solution was to remove myself form the room and ask DH to take over. And DH would sometimes need the time tooo.
MAybe try asking Daddy to step in????

AFM: Last night, I had to go out for a while and Joshua and DH were ALONE!!!!!!!!!!! Needless to say that J was up from 3pm, when I got home at 7pm, DH was chasing him in the house with the toothbrush!!!!!!!!!
Of course, by 7:30 I put him in his cot, switched on the infamous "Jungle Book" handed over bottle and Oscar, kissed and cuddled and left the room.

At 8pm, J was screaming, and I went back to check. picked him up. Cuddled and explained that its "Sleepy time". So I left again.
This is where I realised that J didn't want to cuddle but rather he wanted DH to chase him around. This was the manipulation thing trying to come thru. This screaming soon stopped and became a moan and by 8:30 he was asleep!!!!!!!

So please Memo, be calm, leave if you need to take a time out, refocus and calm yourself and Jude. Patience.....

Can I also suggest: take turns to put Jude to bed. J was used to only Mommy puts him to bed and if I was out, by the time I got home... Dh is ready to crack, and Joshua is still running wild....
I got home one evening at midnight and Joshua was wide awake waiting for me to put him to bed. So I sat Dh down, and practically forced him to learn how to put J to bed.

Often, even just the day before ysterday, he breaks routine and cuddles and rocks him to sleep. But then J will wake constantly to need that cuddling during the night, and me... well I wake DH and tell him to go sort out his mess.

Lesson well learnt, so now he also just puts him in bed "early". No rocking etc

Leandre, good job it really sounds like you're doing an awesome job!
That really is some good advise 1st timer! I hear you on the hang in there, I have often let other people put him to sleep, cos according to me all it takes is time. And I do find that if I just resign myself to it it does become more about cuddles and less about sleep making and I actually find myself clinging to him a little longer after he's fallen asleep. Little hunny.
I do also often however find myself dreading the time approaching cos I know it's gonna take long.. More often than not, to be honest, I am already irritated by something else I guess..
I agree with you about the hitting and shouting Claudia and in my book it's pretty much the same thing really!
I do believe that if I shout so will he and ofcourse he can tell when I'm losing it..
I'm really looking forward to the hangin in there part getting shorter but I'm guessing by the time that happens I'll possibly miss it? (pretty screwed up

some wise words 1st Timer - I like point 3.

Memo - I just wanted to add there were three bits of advice that really stood out for me when I was desperately googling for help in thisand spiralling more and more into the blackness the preceded naptime...

1. Bed time and hence nap time should be about love and closeness and cuddles. This will in the longrun make naps and sleeping easier. Now clearly easier said than done but it's what got me started on my current strategy.

2. Eventually, all babies will fall asleep. I promise. It will. Itmay seem like hours. But after enough holding, soothing and shushing they will evenrually goto sleep. My dad gave me tgis advice and ithought he was talkug out his pie hole but the one night he babysat and James was being a nightmare and true as bob eventually afterabouthalf an hour of my dad (!) singing and rocking, he fell asleepm so basicallyget comfortable, put Jude in your arms and hang in there the "hanging in" willeventually get shorter.

And the last bit of advice I got that iliked was that you baby actually DOES want to sleep. It's a biological imperative. He just doesn'tknow how. So when you feel like throwing him across the room take a breath and remember he's not trying to be naughty he just needs his mom or whoever to help him

Sorryabout all the typos. On my blackberry and the keyboard is tiiiiiiny!
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OH, I don't eat J's left overs and I can see that his little heart breaks when Mommy says no thank you. He then stares at me whilst offering it to daddy, who will eat whatever. Or at least pretend to

So somedays when i run out of patience, I look for ways to distract. Walking outside, looking at birds (he loves birds and last week we bought a Cockatiel, he's called James) leaving the house - even just going to buy a bread helps.

But my lates trick is us sharing food. He loves feeding us, and now especially mommy. I cannot describe the look/ feeling of happiness that J had when he offered me half of his already wet eaten fling and he put it in my mouth. it was such a brilliant moment. I have now decided to grin and bear it and let my child share his food with me.

As for cupboards, we have 2 cupboards that he's allowed to unpack. We (Or I - DH says that I'm way to strict as J is still a baby) made sure that he knows what he can and cannot touch. Over teh weekend I used the tumble dryer and J loves taking the warm clothes out. So I tell him that the door is hot and not to touch it as he will burn. Of course my child loves pushing the boundaries and touched it. You should've seen the look on his face but I calmly said that I told that you will burn but you wnated to touch it anyway. He then politely waited for me to handover his PJ's then he went to put them in his room. Lesson learnt, needless to say, That J now waits until you handove clothes from Tumble dryer.

He has also learnt that he cannot do as he pleases at our home as well as when we are out visiting people or even just eating out. I become very annoyed with the banging cutlery at the table. SO J has learnt that very very early already.

I agree with all the comments, But I think you need a hellavu lot of PATIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some days Joshua goes down without a fight and other days, well it's a bit tricky....

I too have a very strong willed child and at Nursery school, the teachers have no issues. Joshua seems to take charge of his class, telling the other kids what to read, where to walk/crawl etc

I have a routine at bedtime only, eat, bath (7pm), watch a movie(until 7:30 - 8pm). These days its Jungle Book 2 every night, but i don't mind as I don't stick around.
So when we start the movie, I put him in his cot, tell him its sleepy time, kiss him goodnight, hug him, handover Oscar (his toy dog) and also everyone else that he requires on that occassion, then leave the room. Many nights he's sleeping within 10mins. Then I remove everyone from the cot but Oscar stays, as he looks for him during the night, and switch off the lights.

By doing this consistently, he now manages to sleep better as he self soothes. Also, bonus 'cos he takes naps/ time outs in his cot on weekends. When I see that my child is now in his exploring/screaming phase, I tell him that he can have a nap if he wants or just play in his cot for a while, ALONE! Normally, he'll sleep sometimes he just plays quietly for an hour soemtimes longer. This gives me and him time to calm down and refocus....