Trying for a 2016 baby

Hello Ladies,

@Anzel, thank you for the welcome. How are you feeling?

My name is Bonsile Stewart. My husband and I got married in 2014, and we immediately started TTC. Unfortunately I have been diagnosed with PCOS, on metformin. I had 2 unsuccessful rounds of clomid last year. I am seeing a gynae in PTA this coming Monday, for a full check up. Hope all goes well.

Hi Ladies,

@Anzel - How are you feeling?

@Chanti - how are you? I actually went on one of the sites that my Gynea gave me for when we want to do IUI, and I think they charged R45 000 for IVF. it is in Gauteng though (I think )

How are the rest of you wonderful ladies?

AFM - Saw Gynea on Tuesday and everything is looking okay. I told her that I don't want to take clomid again and she was okay and said that it is better. I wont take it again. She said everything else is looking good, she did a papsmeer and if I don't hear anything from her then the results are fine. She said that I will probably ovulate within 36 hours or something to that. So I assumed she was right. I had a temp drop this morning so will see what it does. This month hasn't been any good for BD'ing. We are so busy that at this stage it is not funny, we basically live on coffee, not good, but makes me happy lol. I have also been using Fertile xx (herbal) and it is doing wonders. Even my skin is feeling nicer.
O she also said that we can give it until October and if I am not pregnant by then, then we can really consider IUI. I trust her, God has put her on my path, you don't always find a Doc that believes in Science but also Believes in God. So I am blessed to have her in my life.

Hi Anzelmama,

Your symptoms definitely sounds very positive to me.
If you are pregnant it is your miracle and you have gone through so much to get to where you are now.
You deserve all the happiness in the world. You have been patient and from what i've read you only have kind words for the next person.

Many people have gotten BFPs from 9dpo, so maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to POAS?

HI, ladies

Me again! Cheeeeez, it's quiet on here!!

Just wanted to update all of you: I am on CD27, 11DPO, and have started getting mild breast tenderness and pelvic cramping. Apart from that I remain hungry and extremely thirsty - I think I finished 4 liters of water yesterday! It's not that hot, so I don't get all the water drinking! LOL! This may, off course, clarify my bloating - My hands are swollen and my wedding ring is very tight, struggling to get it off in order to put on my make-up. The normal fatigue and abundant creamy white CM I normally get a few days before af, is once again with me. Nothing out of the ordinary, really. My boobs don't hurt that much, compared to previous months, and my skin is clear, but apart from that, all is normal. I am expecting AF to arrive by Sunday/Monday. I am contemplating POAS - I have one early detection test and two dipsticks... I don't know...

Now that my sister in law is pregnant, I am almost inclined to say that I really hope that I'm not pregnant. Off course I will not reject the baby if I am pregnant - Cheeeez, I've waited forever for my own baby, but it won't be the same. I was so excited to be the first one in our family with a baby, and now this. Anyhow, I'll know by Monday what goes for what.

Hope the rest of you are ok?

Hi, ladies

Hope you are all well! It's so quiet on here - Mostly my posts the last few days! LOL!

@Sugar - Thank you. It's nice to know that others also know how it feels. I have the typical middle-child syndrome at the moment! What CD are you on? Did you use OPK's? I hate it when our bodies plays these tricks on us! Holding thumbs!

AFM, CD24, 8DPO - Still no significant symptoms. Not even those I get in the week leading up to AF. This is so weird! Anyways, I'm hoping that af arrives over the weekend, so that we can start another cycle. This would be ideal, as then I don't have to share a birth month with my dreaded sister in law! Anyway. Gotta run - Have a textbook to finish by the end of this week.

@Anzel I can only imagine how you were feeling. I have a sister and I always felt like our whole life has been a competition. I know I would feel exactly as you were feeling.
That being said, your Little One would be the most loved little baby in the entire world. You and hubby have waited for so long and the amount of love you will have for baby is incomparable, to your sister in law.
Dont allow anyone to take away your happiness. This could be your moment, and if it is you need to enjoy it! Doesnt matter about anyone else. This is between you and hubby. The happiness and Joy you will feel should eclipse everyone else's negativity. Sending hugs your way!

AFM I have no idea actually. I havent had any EWCM this month. I either ovulated early or didnt ovulate at all. Either way we out of the running this month. I am still having quit a bit of CM most days - but have no idea what that means. Im thinking of dropping out of this TTC, just until i get my period and can track better. At the moment its all just a guessing game, and my heart cant handle it anymore.

Hi, ladies

Thank you so much for your support and sharing your stories. Your strenght and support got me through the weekend. I lost almost 4kgs, not that I complain, but that's the extent of my feelings over the weekend.

Today I feel so much better. I think I have made peace with their pregnancy and the baby. It's not the baby's fault, so I can't reject it because I don't have a baby yet. So I've decided to do the right thing - I am going to crochet a baby blanket, booties and beany for this baby. Yes, I am. My time and love going into that gift. Why? Because I was told to bless them, if I want to be blessed. Does it still hurt? Absolutely! Do I still have questions? Off course I do! But I've come to realise that God's plan is so much bigger than ours. Maybe this baby is the final push my brother and his wife needed to break free and start their own little nest, taking up responsibility for themselves and this baby, no longer sponging off my parents. I don't know if they will do this, but I hope they will. I hope they realise that you can't raise a baby in a one-bedroom grannyflat. You should see this place. It's two single garages linked in their lenght with each other. The back garage is the bedroom/open-plan bathroom with only a shower. One set of cupboards. The front garage is a kitchenette/living room area. It is extremely small. Actually only suitable for one person, and now they want to fit two adults with a baby in there. Eish! Well, they have made their bed, they have to sleep in it, I suppose.

What helped me make peace with this, is the freedom I had to share exactly what I feel on this forum. And knowing you will understand. People who have not gone through such a trial, will never ever understand the raw emotion and bitterness you feel if you have been struggling with infertility. I actually had a bit of a tiff with my mother. She doesn't understand mos what I am feeling. She sms'ed my mom in law and said that she doesn't know what to tell me. For a pastor, who is supposed to be able to deal with any type of problem faced by people to day, that is a lousy excuse. I just think she doesn't really comprehend the extent of my heartache and bitterness. She went on-and one and one - Talk to me. How are you? Are you ok? Tell me, I will understand. And when I did tell her exactly how I felt, to the tee, she flipped out and said that I hurt her. All of a sudden this is about her? Excuse me? Now I've hurt her? Wow. I really got a knock there. I couldn't understand her behaviour - She said I should tell her how I feel, that she would understand. She clearly didn't.

Well, we are on speaking terms again, mom and I. Yet, something is different. I suppose I am different. I have lost my trust in her, won't share my deepest darkest feelings with her anymore. Just for in case I hurt her again. Now I'd rather keep it to myself. My mom in law completely understands my situation. She waited four years before she conceived my husband, and another 10 years for his brother. So she knows. And she let me be, allowed me time to work through this on my own, while still being there, supporting me silently on the side. I really appreciate my family in law during this time. My brother in law brought me a box of tissues, a juice, chocolate and jelly sweets to work on Friday. My poor students didn't know what was going on with me. I was crying the whole time. He also popped in Friday night, just to encourage me and to hear if I am ok. It helps to get all of this off your chest. That's why I feel so much better today. Talking about it, ranting and raving and crying like a maniac, helped to work through it and make peace.

So today, on CD 23, 7dpo, I am still experiencing absolutely no symptoms. Period is due in a week, so I'll have to wait and see. But you all know about Murphy's Law... The one month that I don't want to be pregnant anymore, because I don't want to share a pregnancy with my sister in law, that's exactly the month that I will be pregnant. lol! We'll have to wait and see.

Hope you all have a restful Sunday! Take care!