Sweet 16

Tanja has basically left home now as she is staying in Res at the university, and it is extremely hard. My baby has grown to quick - I still want her to be my little girl. But we have to let go and allow them to live their lives. She often said I must allow her to make her own mistakes, on which I replied, but I've already made the mistakes, you can just learn from it.

Truth is, at their age their social life is important to them, and we need to make the leash a bit longer, otherwise we might find little rebels on our hands.

Thanks Wilma - sometimes I feel like I am being completely unreasonable. I allowed her to go to the party on Saturday but fetched her at 21:00. which she wasnt too impressed with but I gave her the option "take it or leave it" and she quickly took it and was quite alright when she got home.

I am scared to death that something will happen to them. I know I have to let go sometime but its sooooo hard

Hi,

It is unbelievable how quick our children grow up. My daughter is 18, and I have also been fairly strict. She was allowed to all school related functions, but had to be home at 11h00. I dropped her and fetched her, and I had the right to pitch up at any time to check on her. Same with house parties. She was not allowed to go to clubs. Her curfew was 11h00 up until the age of 18. Before her 16th birthday it was 10h00. Then I moved it to 10h30. She was never allowed to hang out in malls, she knew that the rules were there to protect her and not because I did not trust her. She was never allowed to walk anywhere, if I couldn't take her, she didn't go. Unfortunately in these days we live in, we have to protect our babies.

It really is hard to believe that my eldest will be 16 this year - scary how time flies.

Anyhow, she has been invited to a 16th birthday party on Saturday and another one on Sunday and me being me (completely paranoid) I had to phone the mother and find out whats what.

Its nice to know that I am not the only mother around that is strict as hell and dont give any leeway. Although my daughter does understand as we have gone through it over and over and over again, I can see that she does get heart sore sometimes, cause her friends mothers seem to allow their kids to do things I dont allow mine to, ie going to the mall alone and staying till whatever time, going to house parties and whatever function the schools can come up with - like rock concerts, walking to where ever they want to go, etc.

Am I just being really silly - I dont even allow my girls to sleep out