MIssesMom - why lock a thread?

As these type of threads always seems to get out of hand, couldn't we introduce a "no reply" thread. We do what Joybaby suggested but send in articles or stories concerning birth choice information (no judgmental stuff, just informative) to one of our moderators who could post it but then no one can comment on such information.

Joybaby that would be ideal, but Nef's article was very interesting and I have posted articles before which gave pros and cons of both natural and c sections including elective c sections and they were not taken as they were intended.

I do think that if we were able to talk like adults and to actually listen to each other then we would see all sides and we would truly understand why women choose to do either a natural birth or a c section regardless of the risks posed.

As with most things in life when someone does something that we wouldn't do, it is hard for us to understand the reasons for it. Instead of asking in a non confrontational way we tend to just judge without knowing the reasons the person has had.

I think what we must try to remember to do is to answer the question posed by the person who starts the thread. If we can't give valuble information which helps, then maybe we shouldn't post. Just a thought. These topics always start off helpful and end in a bad way. There will be true debates which is great.

For this topic the post would be something like "What should I expect from my c section". In this case you can see that the moomie has made her choice and we need to respect her reason. It would be pointless to tell her that she should go for natural.

We do not have to justify our actions, be it bottle feeding, using walking rings or circumcision. There are times where I would have done or used xyz and then I have spoken to others who give a totally different point of view. I can do one of two things, take offence because it doesn't back my opinion or listen and then decide.

I think a good parent is one who listens to various opinions and then decides what is best for both her, her baby and their situation.

I am going to start another thread now to show what I mean.

Claire I am not offended by your post at all. It makes me see a different side of it all.

My post on the thread was very honest and very opinionated, but I am also open to other people's opinions and experiences. I do think we can all learn so much from each other if things are dicussed in a calm way and people are not too sensitive about what is being said.

Looks like I missed another one hehehe!!!

Listen, could I make a suggestion, Misses Mom & Deja (who is hopefully not reading here and enjoying her little baba!)

Could we start a permanent subject somewhere on birthing choices.
But one where we get some professionals to come in and comment.
Where it can be used for pieces such as the one that Nef posted, and perhaps if we come across articles, discuss the benefits of doula's, the different birthing options (which include active labour / hypnobirthing / the different types of natural birth, as well as perhaps stories that can be shared by the mom's of how their birth preference was best for them - or perhaps wasn't.

The truth of the matter is, if we've already had a child, we cannot go back and change our birthing choices (or lack thereof) and therefore these debates definitely 100% of the time will result in offence being taken because lets face it, everyone wants to protect their birthing choice, and rightly so because it was best for them at the time.
We can add some rules - no bickering, no insults. Either its articles, or questions about birthing options for expecting moms, or stories about your birth that will again help expectant moms.
Any opinions not based on the prospect of giving birth and the freedom to choose can be deleted so that this remains an unbiased fact based topic.
Then at least there is an ongoing discussion about birthing options that does not get abused / out of hand or locked. Everyone posting does so knowing that if there is a hint of resulting in offense or getting personal, the post would be deleted (perhaps with warning in advance).

Your thoughts please, anyone who feels they'd like to comment?

PS I'm sure we'll have another debate on the topic in the general posts but could this one just be a general and informative topic separate from the other?

PS Ofcourse I missed out on giving my opinion on the topic. But the reason for my suggestion is because I truely believe our birth choice was the best at the time, and could be of some help if I shared my story, as may someone elses.
Would I like another choice next time? If the circumstances allow, perhaps. But if not, will do what's best for LO as the last time.

Please don't take this the wrong way, I am not commenting to start an arguement or cause any bad feelings, however please do not judge people who have elective c-sections to "fit into their schedule" to harshly.

I had my first elective C so that my husband could be part of the experience, so that he could at least see and bond with his child before he had to go offshore again.

Brandon's due date 2 days after DH would have left for Nigeria, so he at least had 2 weeks with his son.

My second elective C, we juggled around as much as we could to try have Liam while DH was home, but unfortunately that was not possible - Liam was born via c-section 2 weeks after DH left, and once again it was scheduled "to fit my schedule", so that my mom could be here with me to help out. DH finally met his second son when Liam was about 8 weeks old

I would also just like to add, also just to be clear, that I also do not have any issue with moms having c sections for medical reasons, or like being raped and it being to traumatic to go through a natural birth. Those are all exceptions. I was referring to women doing it more for convenience and just so that it could fit into their schedule.
But I do not want to turn this thread into another discussion and I do not want to step on any more toes than I already have.

GW, Julz, Chanz and Meags thanks, points taken and I do see why, in light of these responses and the emotions that get stirred up, it’s probably best that the thread is closed.

Betty, to be clear, as said in my posts on the other thread, I am in no way critical of a mom who has a c-sec for medical reasons. Included in these would be a phobia of natural childbirth (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tokophobia). Being critical of someone who has an emergency or elective “medical” c-sec would be as stupid as being critical of someone who has surgery to remove an appendix when they have appendicitis. It’s just not an issue and it’s great that we live in a time when these surgeries are possible. I just wouldn’t be able to understand it if they had the surgery without having appendicitis.