How old are your kids?
Aby is nine, Jono is four, Adam is 20 months old
What is your favourite recipe for kids?
Did you breastfeed and for how long?
Yes, I used a bottle as well. Nothing wrong with it, sometimes you need to give them girls a break. Also bottle feeding helps family bond with baby. I breastfed my daughter for only two hours ... family stress got too much. My sons I breastfed for six months each.
What is your advice for:
Nappy rash: Depends on severity, old wives' tales can only go so far. Bennetts and Fissan paste.
Teething: Rubbery toy with love and comfort, it’s itchy gums with pain.
Potty training: Siblings are a big help, hence why the age gap is really not an issue. If there are no siblings, patience and dry towels.
Morning sickness – Again many old wives' tales will work and some won’t. I only had it once with my first boy and it was very bad. I would say ask your doctor, or just get rest. Take care of yourself.
Which three things are always in your nappy bag?
Nappies, extra set of clothes, wet wipes.
How do you discipline your children?
With a lot of patience.
What's your definition of 'terrible twos'?
My youngest and the tantrum phase! I once threw a tantrum with and right next to my daughter when she just turned two, in a shop. I don’t care what people thought of it, because it worked. Never had a tantrum from her since that day, she is now nine.
Have you ever been for a family photo shoot? If yes, what advice do you have for kids to behave at the photo session?
I have, with Becca Boo Photographic Studio. She got the most amazing photos and my kids were difficult, but once we started having fun, all was fine.
The cutest thing your child has ever said or done.
When they start giving kisses, or tell you they love you, on their own. When they surprise you with something they have never done before, making you proud.
What is a mom?
A pillar, a rock, a form of solace. The one you can talk to, fight with, love, learn from. I learnt how to look after my husband, by seeing my mom go through living hell, looking after my dad. Even when he was terminally ill she was the one who loved him till his last days, right by his side. Motherhood is also an adventure. My oldest son has autism and my hubby Asperger’s. My daughter, youngest son and I don’t have it. So the house is very different, but understanding. You will get obstacles thrown at you, there will be times when you can’t get up, being a single mom, with domestic problems, or crap at work. The list is endless and the lashes keep coming. Believe and never ever give up hope, always do what is right for the kids, you will recover. Things will get horrific, but persevere, YOU WILL WIN!!! And when you do, it will feel so good.
How do you and your husband make time for each other?
We discuss what we can do, would like to do, and fit it in whenever we can. You have to know that everyone has a role, whether you have a wife or husband, accommodate each other.
Angelique's son was in ICU for a month after he was born.
Why was he in ICU?
His immune system was not healthy enough.
How did you and your husband cope during that time?
Tears, many many tears. My husband stayed busy. My son was born on my birthday, via emergency C-section and only came out of ICU five days after Christmas.
What advice do you have for moms whose newborns have to go to ICU?
Always try talking to them and keep skin on skin contact. I saw horrific things that terrified me, but the nurses were amazing. Be there for your baby, child or husband. No matter what the situation, remember that you are not the only person worried. The other kids and your family are their too. If it is only you, try therapy or talking to somebody. My PSTD (posttraumatic stress disorder) got very bad, I spoke to somebody about it, meds can only go so far. Talking about it relieves the stress a lot
Angelique tells us a little more about autism:
In short, what is autism?
Autism is a complex neurobehavioral condition that includes impairments in social interaction and developmental language and communication skills combined with rigid repetitive behaviours. Children with autism have trouble communicating.
Are there different stages of autism?
Well, it’s not exactly stages, it is more how high on the spectrum you are. Only neurologists can tell.
At what age was your son diagnosed with autism?
At 3 years
How did the news made you feel?
That I needed to do all I can to know how to handle it. Like I said before, you have to deal with what you are given.
What symptoms did he have?
No proper speech or interaction is how it started.
How is he doing know? Are there days and times that are worse than others and why? How do you handle the situation?
At four he kept hacking into his mini iPad, then downloading games and playing them. Electronics are like his comfort zone. He can handle it some days, but sometimes he actually goes and hides. So I go sit with him to make him feel like he is not alone. We don’t talk or anything. I just sit.
What advice do you have for parents whose kids have autism?
Patience, have a lot, research a lot too. Try everything you can. Most of all it is NOT a sentence. These children are crazy smart so don’t make the bad things outweigh the amazing things they will achieve.
What medication is he using?
None, apart from therapy. Confirm with the neurologist, in case you are not sure.
If there is anything else about autism, please feel free to share it with us.
There are Facbook pages that can help Autism South Africa and Autistic not weird.
Tell us a little more about your husband's autism situation, please.
My hubby has Asperger’s, a neurobiological disorder on the higher-functioning end of the autism spectrum. An individual’s symptoms can range from mild to severe. He is ALWAYS by his PC, as that is his happy place. It has taken a long time to get used to his actions and research to make sure I accommodate him. Aspies don’t feel emotion that much so sometimes they forget. But we have fun learning about it more together.
At what aged was he diagnosed with autism?
Only at 28. Not knowing what was wrong with him before that made it super hard. It was a lot easier when we knew how to handle it.
How does it effect your family, especially the kids?
The kids who do not have it, find it difficult. My daughter always wants to play with him and he only plays with them sometimes. My youngest can keep himself busy, so it’s not as hectic.
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