June 2010

Nelria & Jane - I so hope tht you both get babies to turn - praying!!

Mrs SH - shame man I feel it with you.

I'm so p'd off at that damn man right now - he doesnt tell me a thing! I didnt get keelie ready for school today cos Im just sooo tired and he's at home - so he tells me as Im about to exit that he has to work on a job today and keelie needs to go. So Im like 'why didnt you say something' - and he gets all mad.

Now Im in the office and cannot yell on the phone - and I so desparately want to yell! I am so mad I could just leave work for the day so that I can go home and shout at that*@$#Z&*!! idoit! @ss!

Shame Mrs SH! You are not being unsupportive you are right. Where are his priorities. By law he is allowed 3 days paternity leave! What would happen if he was needing the others in the office to stay and work - would they... I would maybe allow him to cool down and then perhaps broach the subject again... This is no a puppy you are bringing home, its a baby... made by God from Dad & Mom! Goodluck!

mrs s - unfortunatley what u just said is exactly how ours planned out with lea and it sucks but once its u and your little boy dh might be little of third wheel so if he is home great if not then u will be cool - strongs!!!!! remember

With lea brett was entitled to 3 days paternity leave so monday night my water broke, lea was born tue - brett took tue and wed off - by thursday they were phoning and harassing him saying he MUST come in OR ELSE and he went back lea was in Nicu and I stayed on for 4 more days alone he would only come at 8 at night as he works in Jhb - then on monday we were released i thought he would take his 3rd day and NO his boss insisted on something so mum had to take us home which sucked but as soon as I was home and it was just the 2 of us I felt at peace and I was able to get my mindset ready, dote on her, think of my needs(not worry over him) and just enjoy us

on the plus side that 1st mnth u feel like total idiot handling baba and figuring out how to not hurt, wra, burp, feed, carry, calm, quiet etc and u feel more comfortable on own as nobody to watch screw-ups - then as bonus huby looks like idiot and he respects your pro-ness at nights and on wknds - plus they get home for important stuff like bath etc

xxx

Morning ladies,

Nelria - I'm sure Xen will move, he's probably just a tease! Good luck!

I'm feeling a bit off-ish today too. DH and I aren't speaking (*this never happens and is really upsetting me*).

How long are you DH's taking off for birth and paternity?

DH has his own business (it's only him) and his biggest contract is Pam Golding. So yesterday he skype's me and says that the only other person at Pam Golding who can do his work has been booked off for a holiday from 10 June - 24 June. My EDD is 12 June. So needless to say I'm immediately upset and pissed off and tell him that - and that I expected that he was going to be at home, work free for at least one working week (5 days). But he says that was never going to happen! I'm like, say what??

So he says that he would never be able to take a whole week off, he might be able to work from home, but if anything needs to be uploaded (which is daily), he will have to go in. So now I'm at a loss for words - and just stare at him. I'm like, we're having baby - it's our first child and you're telling me straight-faced that you are not able to take 5 working days to spend uninterrupted time just as we get home. I go off about the 3 day depression that apparently hits, the pain of milk coming in, the fact that I'm not going to want my folks, sister and friends there, but him, etc etc.

And he says no, he can't. He's job might be in jeopardy if he takes off. And he is now the sole breadwinner and he can't put his main contract in jeopardy or under stress. I'm like, you've worked there for 2 years, have you not booked paternity or spoke about taking time off and what are the chances that you'll loose your job if you're having a baby. And he reckons that's how unreasonable they are. (Which is bull in my eyes - he works with women who all have children!)

Anyway, this goes on for a while and goes backwards and forwards - the last thing he said was that I have to accept that this is the way it's going to be and I can sulk as much as I want, it's not going to change anything. I just walk away and we haven't said a word to each other since. Not even kissed good-night or goodbye this morning.

And it's killing me. I know I need to make peace, but seriously I'm terrified now. I don't think I"m being unreasonable. It's our first child. WE'RE in the this together. All I want is his undivided attention for a few days just as we get home. How will I cope?

I didn't picture it like this at all and it's really really thrown me. I had this picture in my mind that this first week we'll be able to talk about what just happened, figure out what baby wants, coo over how cute, generally enjoying/being terrified of this little beautiful creature together and now it seems that that's not going to happen.

Anyway, please tell me whether I'm being a terrible unsupportive wife or totally unreasonable? I'm finding it hard to see it from his perspective, please help me understand his train of thought.

thanks eloise and skyler MWah Mwah

jane - yes its stupid to worry and not know but all I hope is xen grows and turns and stays put so will hope for u to - well done on weight and why the expensive scans?

Morning ladies,

SOOOO glad it is weekend! I had to finish my two year reports yesterday and that meant that I had to literally go up and down steps (3 storey building) a lot. Last night I was so pooped, when we got home after the antenatal classes I went straight to the bath and straight to bed and straight to sleep. Did not even wake up once to go to the loo.

Had to jump up this morning though, since Chloe kicked me on my 9 hour full bladder.

Is it just me, or is the time going by so slowly? Must say the fact that we get to see the Dr every two weeks makes it feel shorter now.

The temp outside our home this morning was 4^oC. Nice cuddle weather, just a shame my tummy is growing by the day. Can't cuddle that nicely anymore.

Have a nice day ladies. I will be doing two trust reports today, thus no time for chit chat.

Nelria - you in same boat as me then... try website www.spinningbabies.com I got some useful info there.

Was at Dr today. Got to go for a weekly doppler scan (they scan flow through umbilical cord) before seeing Dr. EXPENSIVE!!!!! But I walked away smiling. All measurements were in the normal range. Caitlin has done SO well - she is still breech, but has grown and I managed to put on 1.2kg's in 7 days! So Dr said he was much happier than last week. Going again on Thursday. Asked (to DH's embarassment -sp) for a discount cos we have to go weekly for scan and are on hospital plan only and they ended up giving me about R150 off!!! Needless to say DH was VERY impressed! If you don't ask, you don't get!!!

Sleep - seems to be a common problem. I seem to sleep well til about 1 / 2am and then struggle to fall asleep. Strange though cos I wake up feeling refreshed!

DH's work gave us a basket full of goodies today. I don't know where to go with all the stuff anymore! Feel really blessed cos there is really nothing I need at this stage. Got the last goodies at Dischem today for my hospital bag and exchanged goodies at Baby City for a pram / car seat mobile

MRS SH - Cool re bonus! It makes such a difference to an employees attitude when a company appreciates their employees like that.

Is anyone else getting really excited now??? I am feeling nervous cos birth (natural vs. csec) may go either way at this stage, but I am so excited to meet our little bundle! But I also want her to stay put till she is term

Enjoy your evening ladies...this forum has been such a help bouncing things/issues off you guys.