Feb-May 2011 Mommies

Good Morning Ladies. Hope you are all well.

MistyMom and Newyum Mum- any news huns??

Meags - I'm reading all your post but don't know quite what to say to you. I never went through all that with my babies. Callum's been my most difficult baby and it's not even 1/4 of what you are going through. I wanted to suggest that you maybe don't leave him until he cries to start soothing him - like don't just leave him because he is calm and then start soothing when he cries?? Do you know what I mean? Cuddle him while he is awake and settles and yes when he wakes, immediately offer the boob - I don't ever let Callum cries for food - because once he screams, it takes a while for him to settle and actually feed. Also if you express, don't express until you've got no more milk, because then off course your boobs will produce more and more as you keep emptying the breast. Just express to relieve the engorgement. I think you need to calm down and take things a bit slower - try not to go out for a couple of days - maybe a week - and just spend time with Matt - don't worry about anything else - the house, your mom, dinner, expressing etc. etc. etc. Just be calm and spend time with Matt - if he scream, try to just hold him, bath with him - you can put one of those material stands in the bath so you can get out quickly while he is lying on that and then take him out. Hope I didn't say anything to annoy you . Strongs girl. Oh ya, let us know what the midwife says. LOL re Matt on the loo with you - I think most moms had to do that at some stage.

Em's Mom - I keep forgetting to ask you - last time I asked why you went for a c-section with Em - I actually meant - with Kate - why did you eventually went for a c-section with Kate - did you not dilate? Sounds hectic what you went through with Em............I would have freaked out too!

Rakker - can't wait for some news!

I've got a swing for Callum - bought it here on Moomie from someone - it's a Fisher Price one and also folds up - must be the same swing Betty? It's got a big lion picture on. I don't think they are too expensive - try search Gumtree for 2nd hand swings.

Lucy - how are you doing today? Maybe it's a growth spurt but I can imagine that you must be tired. How is she feeding now?

Schatsie - he he I also don't do the wash the hair thing first - I just put baby in the bath - with lots of water and wash him in the bath - did this with all my kids and they all loved bath time - never cries. The last couple of nights I bath Callum with the girls and then let him 'swim' as well. As soon as I take him out - he starts crying! That thing over the changing table is really cute.

AFM - Dorcas is going on leave today so I will most probably be very quite the next two weeks. I'm not sure how I am going to cope without her seriously. Callum was 3 months old on Monday - can't believe it! Did you all see Anje's baby? I've posted a pic on the forum under Goods & Services and on FB. She really is just too gorgeous.

my goodness I can really post essays!

Hi ladies

I did read everything but not sure I have time to go back and do personals so will do what I can remember.

Lucy - have you got any expressed milk? of not, would you be willing to give formula? maybe you can give a bottle and rest your nipples and BF every 2-3 hours and if she wants in between give the bottle? Shame I hope it gets easier! She seems to love mommy's food!

Rakker - you are having your baby soon!!!!!!!!!!!!! Doesnt it feel so unreal???

MistyMom - ok your sister is gone to Durban now...so where are you??!! hehe

Schatsie those things over the change table are great. I have hung a bug on a spring above our change table. he started noticing it last week. Not that he's really interested...but he does look at it!

BettyF - Matt is on prescription meds for the reflux already. And paed recommended a soy based formula for him. I am still in trial mode of this feeding issue...so we have been on formula for 24 hours and no change so far....Giving it to lunch time tomorrow as they say it takes 36 hours to see a difference. So if there is no difference, we are back onto breastmilk and BF. BUT...I have a new thing I am going to try...I am going to put the boobie in his mouth every 90 minutes. Because this is generally before he wakes so he wont be hysterical or alert enough to cry. If he wakes before the 90 minutes, I will immediately give breast instead of trying to settle him. I know he will be getting boobie a lot...but anyway, he will only drink what he feels like drinking and at least he will (hopefully) be taking the breast without issues. I am thinking of not giving a bottle after the breast. Letting him be hungry enough that he will feed sufficiently off the boob?

ok update on me.
I know this is TMI (the next 2 things I'm gonna tell you).
1) I had to laugh...Matt is in my sling and I needed a number 2...but I dont wanna risk putting him down as I needed to sort and sterilise bottles, prepare water for formula, sort out milk (I ran out of milk bags for the freezer so been piling up in fridge) so I had to go to the loo with him on me still in the sling!! What a sight
2) I really think there is something wrong down there...I know I should have called my midwife like 2 weeks ago already. but I really keep forgetting and when I remember, it's after 5pm or Matt is fussing or something...
I had a look with the mirror and I can still see my cervix. It looks like it does after a birth so this is not normal...It has not started moving back into pre pregnancy state and it is still bruised. This scares me!! Also, I still have that stinging. So I had a look there too and there is a wound. I know the midwife saw it but she obviously decided it wasnt bad enough to need stitches and would heal on its own. problem is that it is still bleeding bright red blood which means it has not healed at all. Also, I think an air pocket is forming there. I really need to call her tomorrow and perhaps I will have an appointment on Thursday. Didnt really want to do it while my mom was still here but I dont think i should delay it since its now Easter weekend and public holidays etc. At least I can manage to do some kegel exercises now...before I couldnt feel those muscles at all. I am sure if I actually did those exercises then my cervix would be where it should be...but I really dont think about kegel exercises AT ALL.....
Maybe when you ladies post, each of you can just write kegel and then I'll remember to do it each time I read a post?! hehe (by the way I'm actually serious...)

tomorrow is our 1 month check up. vaccinations only start here at the 2 month check up. curious to see his weight and length. He looks as though he has grown in length quite a bit.

Oh I forgot to tell you something funny. on saturday we went to a food and music festival. (sadly it poured with rain the whole time!) So there was this lady sitting nearby and kept watching me handle Matt. she came up to me and asked if it was my first baby i said yes. She then started advising me on stuff! so she first said that the baby might be crying because it's windy and his ears might be sore. I explained he has reflux and colic and he is like this all the time. She then showed me how to burp him over my shoulder!!! Like I dont know how to do that!!! Anyway I was polite and acted like a "dumb" mom and thanked her for the advice etc. She then also prayed for Matt while he was screaming his lungs out! Ok so off she goes. A while later we feed him and of course he has an episode which is normal after a feed (for him). So DH is holding him and gives him to my mom as he is going to buy some drinks. My mom is trying to calm him but I just wanted her to give him to me because I wanted him. So I took him. Then that friggin lady comes over and says "can I take him and try settle him". so I said "no we are fine thanks". so you can see she looks distressed (as Matt is now WAILING!) and she says "are you sure? let me just take him to help". so i snapped and said "NO it's FINE" and my mom said "She is a midwife so she knows what she is doing" anyway I just walked away. i couldnt believe her. you know there is a fine line between being helpful and then being invasive. and no means no and it was like she thought all 3 of us were incapable of settling him! I was really annoyed!

so yes, paed and chiro tomorrow. then mom leaves on thursday. cant believe she has almost been here 4 weeks already and that she is now leaving! But I am looking forward to being free to walk around topless doing skin to skin with Matt, putting him to the breast as often and wherever I want to. not having to feel like I need to go out to entertain my mom. I think I am going to have many lazy days ahead just bonding. Plus, DH has been doing the 2am feed while I pump so he is EXHAUSTED (hehe...from only 1 wakening!) so he will be happy to sleep until like 10 or 11 each morning. he is on leave for another week.

oh yes schatsie just to comment on what you said about all this affecting my bonding. yip I totally agree. but I also think having my mom around has been a little bit of a challenge too. All the lactation consultants have said I have to do skin to skin as often as I can during the day, letting him sleep on me etc. I cant do this with my mom. even when I'm topless pumping, she'll look at me and say "oh thats most attractive" in a sarcastic manner. yes I know it's not my sexiest look...but I'm doing everything for the well being of Matt and that is all that matters. I dont know how I will just stop the pumping and attempt at BF. I am sure if he refuses the boob, I will continue pumping as long as I can manage. But I know the next time I get a very sore blocked duct, I will pop those pills to dry the milk. that pain really gets to me! so basically I am trying to say that yes, if BF doesnt work, you are right. I need to then move on, give formula and work on bonding with Matt in other ways. It is easier said than done though Since he latched and fed last night - I have this new found confidence. He CAN do it because he DID do it!! The challenge now is to figure out how to get him to do it without being so hysterical. Also, whether I try boob or bottle, it's the same affect really. He drinks fine the first bit, then screams the last bit. so if I have to struggle with the bottle, why not struggle with the boob? Surely at some stage he will calm down? Surely he cant be this angry little being for the next 9 months???

Finally in bed, desperately trying to finish off some work.. Seems the be taking for ever, now my legs feel slightly swollen, wonder if it is from sitting at desk

Amy- lovely name, Hafsa Never knew about baby's tongue curling up. Thanks for the tip.

Rakker- the time has come rest well tonight and have a wonderful birthing experience!

Mistymom- I can't remember now whether gynae said he was on or off that weekend. I know that the 3, Johan, Christine and dr mark rotate weekends somehow. I had m on the weekend, luckily he was there... Hope you enjoyed the curry.. Did you go out? Bukhara is my favorite for Indian food.

Schatsie- your BF clinic sounds fantastic, yay on Arno's weight gain. The change station toys is a very cleaver idea.

Lucy- I hope LO gives you a breather tonight and you can get some rest in.

Kimika, emmsmom- decides to get the carry cot. Well I ordered it, and I should get it in 2 weeks, also ordered a new cover for the car seat
The baby swing that I have is the fisher price take along swing. It is not the one for very small babies, as the baby sits more upright in it. It fold up so the it is easy to take out with you. I think it was one of the cheaper swings. Not sure if Baby city still stock it.

Meags- have you tried gaviscon for babies? Sounds like it's the reflux causing baby discomfort. Give baby anti reflux formula and then offer him breast.

Anyhow off to lala land, sleep well everyone xx

Rakker: (((((hugs))))) such awesome news.......!! All I can say is it will be over before you know it.....and hell if the gynie says it will be quick, then your are really blessed!! Keep us posted and just relax and breath!!

If only curry could help! Been there done that and got the oversized shirt already.

I wonder if Rakker's baby will also have gorgeous blond hair like her bro?

Lucy, has she only been doing this today?? Maybe just a bit of a grpwth spurt? (soz, 1hand typing again) Does she take a dummy? try rock her to sleep with one and then put her down carefully, hips first as not to trigger startle reflex. Then do 20 fast pats on her bum, followed by 20 slow soft pats, followed by a bit of pressure with your hands and then leave. Repeat if she doesnt fall asleep. If she is in a growth spurt there is not much you can do other than to just maar lie down with her to feed and nap. It should last maybe 3 days or so. Dont you have any expressed milk to give her to top her up? Shame, its sooo tiring. Hope it goes over quickly. If she still does that try the dummy or a bit of water to make her stretch her feeds a bit. But dont do that when she is in growth spurt, then she needs the milkies and wont settle for anything else. I see with R is he had a sip of cooled boilt water he will settle a bit easier.. I never did that with my first baby as I believed they shouldnt get any water at that young. But Ive since changed my ways xxx

Hi to the other girls, sorry for no other personals, just wanted to quickly reply to Lucy. xxx

I am shattered, so lets see how this goes!

Tazzy - happy birthday to H!!

Misty -Feta is mostly weary of this new noise making machine, although confidence is growing. He loves blankets so yhat is a big attraction too!

Meags and Kimika - thanks for your feedback. I seem to have the opposite problem. I can't get her to stop feeding. Today has been bad ......... she started feeding at 7am and now at 8pm she is still feeding. She has not slept longer than 7 minutes. I am drained and exhausted. Up til now it has been until about 2pm before she has a nap. Won't be able to keep going for much longer. My nipples won't cope much longer. Not sure that my milk is not nutritious enough as last week she gained 250g so what else?

Rakker - best of luck for tomorrow, can't wait to follow your posts.

Betty, newyum, Schatsie, Amy, Emsmom - Hello, sorry for no personals but I have a babby on my boob still) and I'm doing this left handed. I have read all your news though. Take care