Adoption...

Thank you Charnenay - Its a very emotional decision.

I have decided that if I havent conceived by the end of the year I will make contact with a social worker so will thus keep the website that you recommended. The problem that im experiencing is that my DH was adopted and so very badly want a baby of his own so making the decision of adopting feels like letting him down in a very big way...
Saying that, my DH had a very happy childhood and has no regrets/anger towards his birth parents and has also no intention of meeting them as his point of view is that the people who give birth to you is not necessarily your parents. Your parents are the people who raise you...

I have made peace with the fact that bearing a child might not be in God's plan for me and if that is the case then so be it but cant help but hope somewhere in the back of my head that I will fall pregnant and have a successful pregnancy. In the end of the day, its all in His hands.

I guess time will tell...Again thank you for the information

My sister had adopted 2 beautiful children, so adoption is very close to my heart.

Her eldest, Gabrielle, turned 4 in September (she came home when she was 60 days old)

Her youngest, Nicholas, turned 1 in December (he came home when he was 35 days old)


My sister used Procare (www.procare.co.za). I would suggest that you contact them so that you and your husband can meet with a social worker and make an informed decision. We highly recommend procare.

FYI, the birth mother has 60 days to change her mind. A new law has just been in put in place which does not allow the baby to be placed with his/her adoptive period before the 60 days is over. The baby goes into foster care for the first 60 days.

My sister has helped a few other couples who have adopted, so if you want, I would be more than happy to give you her email address if you would like to ask her more questions.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Thanks Tienka, thats sweet of you!

Thanks EmsMom, I had a look at that site - some usefull info. Will chat to DH and see what he thinks. 9 weeks? Sho thats fast. I suppose the birth mother would need some time in case she changes her mind. Thanks again!

Sue the fact you dont have a preference will make the process much easier. Some adoptions can be sorted out in as little as 9 weeks.

However for a new born it would be best to go private, that way you find a BM (birth mother) and would need to pay her med bills till she delivers, but then all paper work is done before the birth. She will have 3 months however in which she is allowed to change her mind. This is the biggest problem with newborns.

Sue, I want to wish you all the best!! I have 3 beautiful kids of my own so never had to consider adoption. I am sure that there is a tiny baby out there or on the way who would love to have you as his/her mommy!!

Thank you for the info EmsMom

I do not really have a preference as all babies deserve a mum (irrespective of age or race) and all mums deserve a baby but a newborn baby does sound idealistic...

I will have a look at the link!

Thank you again!

Hi Sue

I can imagine this was a hard choice for you, but I know of so many mommies that are happy with adoption.

Firstly do you want to adopt a new born? Or a toddler? Do you have a preference to race?

Private adoptions are best if you want a new born. If you are ok with a toddler, then there are so many Childrens homes that you can go to and foster to adopt.

Here is a link about choosing an adoption method.

www.fertilicare.org/forum/showthread.php...g-an-adoption-agency