August 2015

Sorry, that was quite long winded!

Hi ladies,

Thanks Stella for sharing your experiences and your pics, really beautiful and inspiring!

I have to say, while I'm keen to have a vaginal birth, I'm not sure the med-free experience is for me - I have a very low tolerance for pain. I chose a private maternity facility so as not to be bullied into medical interventions, but I'm also not keen to have meds withheld from me should I feel I'm not coping. I'm not as focused and mentally strong as some, and 14-28hrs is a long time!

I think one of the best things we can all do is have a written birth plan that DH/DF/Doula can help advocate for when we need someone to stand up for us. Then only deviate when medically necessary. Do be realistic though, you may decide in advance to be coached through the pain the first time you feel you want meds, or the first couple of times, but you might want an opt out clause at some point just in case you are really unable to cope and change your mind (say, after 30 hours, ot if you get too exhausted to concentrate on breathing/pushing, etc. Even if you just need some gas or something).

Also, there was a lady at our ante natal class this week sharing her experience of a c-section. She was 40 and had wanted a fully natural birth since 22yrs. She had some complications though, so was medically required to have a c-section. Because she'd never considered this as a possibility (she'd worked really hard at preparing) she didn't have a 'backup' birth plan for what she wanted if this occurred (delayed cord clamping if possible, or banking the cord at least if baby needed icu; skin to skin, etc.) The whole experience caught her completely off guard and so her preferences didn't get carried out. She also went through serious post natal depression, and couldn't bond with her baby for 2 weeks. I know it's not the ideal for most of you, but it is probably wise to have a backup plan for if things don't go as you hope.

My personal birth plan is to take it as it comes - start with breathing and relaxation and water and massage, but I'm also exploring Anaesthetists who are skilled at ambulatory epidurals, so if I'm not coping with things I can get some pain relief while still having mobility, getting into different labour positions, helping the baby get into a good position, and feeling the pressure of contractions without the pain so I can still push, but without the usual negatives other pain relief options have on the baby. That's just my plan though. I admire those of you who go fully natural.

thanx ladies,

i have never been an easy cryer, not even during my previous pregnancy, but now with this one, i also cry spontaneously about anything and everything... ooo these hormones

Lol Ctelly I cry over the silliest and smallest things ever. The other day I cried coz DF left without giving me kiss, heck I even cry over adverts!

Your pictures are beautiful Stella.

Do any of you easily cry? I feel like crying for the smallest thing. anything that's super cute or sad or special.. so far I've managed to avoid it but I think I've got a good cry ahead of me.. haha. I warned hubby yesterday that if I cry he shouldn't take it personally..

Oh Stella, those pictures

Stella, those pics are too gorgeous, that definitely got me excited!