Due August 2018

Morning Ladies,
I really hope you are all doing very well. Our group has gone quiet a bit. Probably all busy with work and life.

I am seeing my doc tomorrow. I will be 25 weeks. I have been struggling with back ache and very bad cramps / contractions. Luckily they are not regular and only happens every now and again. I have also had an increase in discharge. Just hoping it's not amniotic fluids. And I am so so tired. I look like a whale even though everyone keeps telling me I look good and healthy for a women carrying twins. So I'm taking that compliment!
Will wait and see what doc says and see if she will be booking me off early. ON the one side I hope she does (just on semi-bedrest) but on the other hand I still have so much to do at work and we haven't found a temp yet for my position.

We have started painting the nursery over the weekend. We will probably finish it this Saturday. I think it's going to look nice. I will post some pics afterwards. Got the cutest little vests from my cousin in UK saying: "If you think I'm cute, you should see my twin!" Really adorable.

So we have decided on names... Rebecca and Mikayla. Rebecca means "Servant of God" and "One who binds and joins together." Mikayla means "Gift from God"

Have an amazing Tuesday!

@Sparky - totally get the big heart. I also always try to see the better in ppl. And like I always tell my husband, she will always be my mother, and I think it's an inherent daughter thing that we will always seek their approval. I have come to the point where I know I will most likely not get it, but it doesn't change that I will always seek it. We saw my mother weekend before last and she said to me that she wants to have a baby shower for me (nice thought right??) at the end of April/begining of May, and (get this) I can invite 3 friends...I was like...thanks...I think? I am rather surprised that she would invite me to it under those conditions. My mother is also a great example of someone with way too much money for the amount of sense that she has. She works hard and I definitely think she deserves the money she has, but that has become her thing, she throws money at things hoping that they will go away or be quiet or something. Anyway, really hoping our generation of mom's are slightly different from theirs, already seems that way.

@Reese - please disregard if you feel I am out of line, but dont you think you (and your husband for that matter) would benefit from going to talk to someone? When I found out with my last pregnancy that it was a boy I had the most horrible GD and I felt like an ass for feeling that way, but I could not help my feelings (not the same situation as yours, just some context to what I'm saying). My husband found me this lady that I still see now that really helped me so much. She is a social worker in private practice dealing in birth/general mom support and was such a perfect fit for me. We went through some pretty shitty times as a family last year and she was key in helping me sort through the things in my head. Just think that having thearapy should really be mandatory for all people b/c it really helps to talk to a 3rd party that is outside the situation that is able to tell you that you are nuts/acting nuts or that helps you understand why you are feeling things and puts them into perspective for you.

Other thing I forgot to mention to you ladies. So my husband works for Cotton On, so we shop there a lot but wanted to tell you about their maternity line they are launching here. Its only in a few stores now but you an find it online. They have lovely sleepwear (its the bamboo cotton so soooooo soft) that has nursing pannels in it, they have a few 'nursing bra-lets' would not really say they can qualify as a full on bra, but maybe something you can wear under jamies or a comfortable t-shirt and they have maternity active wear too. The line is still kind of limited, they are trying it out to see if it goes well. I bought the bra-let and the bamboo jamies but I thought I would mention it to you if you want to check it out

Hope everyone is doing well otherwise

Morning ladies

Seems everyone is a bit stressed/emotional?

Only a little while further then hopefully our hormones calm down

I'm also not on speaking terms with my mother, she decided not to be in my life when i was 16 weeks with my angel so that's nearly 2 years ago and my life is so much better of. I know it sounds horrible but sometimes its better to let go of the negativity.

So anyway I have a huge rant sorry about it but I have had like 2 break downs in the last 2 weeks.
Anyway my sister started living with us in December 17, she only found a job now end of February which i was very happy about for her (first job). But every since she started working its like she became a baby/has this f-you attitude towards me. On top of the job she also found a boyfriend and now its a 100 times worse.

My eldest sister got married on the 24th and we were her bridal party, but my younger sister made the day about herself and its at the wedding that i really just reached my braking point, she was more worried about her hair and makeup than making sure my big sis was happy so me 25 weeks pregnant had to run around the whole day which i don't mind because its my sis's big day but why have 2 braids maids and the other just doesn't give a f? Then the boyfriend arrived at the wedding and he was sitting there with us while we took bride/bridesmaid photos, my younger sisters attention was only with him and she kept running to him instead of staying put for the next photo. After the ceremony it was pretty much the same but i'm sure you get the picture.

So the Monday after the wedding I take her to work, I tell her to grab my house key lock and meet me the car, I drop her of get back home and guess what, she locked with her key and took it to work with her so now I'm locked out of my own house. My parents in law stays in the flat in our yard so I went to my MIL and had my first breakdown.

After that i just ignored my sister. She went to the boyfriend for Easter weekend which was so nice for me because we had some just our time. But then she came back and shes all baby again. She has to help with food/electricity/water money so I tell her to set up her internet banking so she can EFT me the money. My UIF and provident has not been paid yet so I can not buy groceries and the cupboards are empty so I really need this money from her. So yesterday she has to activate the online banking at the ATM so my FIL takes her, she gets her pin incorrect 3 times so now guess who has to take her to the branch on Saturday and has to buy food on credit. She then washed the dishes which is nice but I told her that to save water we will only wash once a day and I had already washed that day so once again she just didn't listen to me.

After that I broke down again, with the stress she is adding and the money I actually for a split second thought that maybe now is the wrong time to have Eliana. So ja that really killed me that I for so long prayed for my rainbow and my sisters actions made me regret becoming pregnant and now I'm all over scared that my thoughts is going to cause me to lose another baby because how can I have her if I'm thinking stuff like that about her.

She is quite today and that does not help with all of this. I just wish the retrenchment didn't happen and that I can slap my sister. I cant even tell her to move out because there is now where ells for her to go and then I feel like a huge ass. My husband actually said last night that this is it if she doesn't start thinking/listening then she has to go so now I feel like I have to protect her as well.

I'm just so tired of being stressed, having my next scan on the 9th at exactly 28 weeks. Praying that she will still be healthy because no matter what i felt in that split second, my Elia is not a mistake or unwanted.

Hi Ladies,

Sorry I've been quiet. just been trying to relax over the long weekend and just to take it easy.

@Reese, I'm sorry to hear things are difficult for you at the moment. One of my friends had twins last year, and it definitely is an adjustment to your lifestyle. She decided not to go back to work for now, and this in turn places more strain in her relationship due to finances etc. Her family are all in KZN (we are in JHB), and her in-laws don't help out at all. So she's understandably emotional and overwhelmed. I'm not telling you this to make you even more negative, I want you to understand that you are not alone. I realised she was taking some strain during her pregnancy already and I have made such effort from my side to be in contact with her everyday, and visit as regularly as possible, just to show her she has someone that is there for her. I really hope that us, the members of this group can be there for you. Sending you lots of love.

@CarienM - I have a big heart and always believe there is good in the world, this is probably why this thing with my mother is bothering me so much. I said to my husband a few days ago, that I just cannot believe that she know about my pregnancy and has not once reached out to ask how am I doing, or even congratulate us. I know I shouldn't be surprised, but I am. You would think when it comes to something like this, that she would put her own agenda aside to be there for her child. I agree with you about her being an ass. In the long run it is her loss, as she will not be part of our lives and get to know her grandchild. I am glad you got to see your little girl again!

I am currently 19w3d, and will be going for anomaly scan next week Wednesday. Hubby and I are excited to see our boy again. He is moving quite a lot and I can see my tummy moving too. Hubby is a bit jealous as baby loves to stop moving when daddy wants to feel. We have decided to do a mountain theme on the walls of the nursery.

I am struggling to sleep as my back is sore and my sides are uncomfortable at night. I also did have some issues with low blood pressure lately, keeping an eye on it. other than that, I am good.

Have a lovely day ladies

Hi Ladies,

@CarienM - so happy to hear your weekend was a little more quiet. I have to say that I don't have that close relationship with my mom either and I'm so grateful that I never had a sister and only 3 brothers. That's why I didn't really want to have daughters. I just saw myself as a boy mommy. Anyways, that dream is long gone!

We went to the Kruger National Park and it was very nice. Saw a lot of things and the girls enjoyed it.
Hubby told me over the weekend that he didn't want the twins. He feels as though this pregnancy ruined a lot of things for us. I know he was just being honest about his feelings and I sometimes feel the same. It's just so difficult to get excited. I haven't started with the nursery.

So I'm 24 weeks today and I am really struggling. I am huge! I have pains everywhere! People at work keep telling me I'm pale. I keep forgetting things and it frustrates my husband. I just cant help it. Everything in my body hurts.

My next appointment is 11 April. Not sure if I will be having the GD test then. Cant remember ever having it to be honest. And then I will also be doing my bed booking. Seems like things are moving fast now and it scares me. I'm not prepared. I'm not ready for this.

I'm so sorry for this negative post. I'm just feeling really down and tired.

I hope you all have an awesome week.

Hi Ladies,

Hope everyone is well. Everyone has been rather quiet, so I thought I would post and see how everyone is doing. Hope everyone had a great Easter Weekend (for those who celebrate) but more importantly, just nice long weekend We had a more quiet weekend, not very quiet, we took our boys to see Peppa Pig on saturday, they really did like it a lot, and it was well done, so happy we were able to do it for the boys. We went to church on Friday and saw some good friends just after church, saturday afternoon we saw my inlaws sunday I was a bit man down, my husband has had this cold flu thing and then my eldest son got it, now I have it and my youngest is also full of snot, so hopefully we can shake it soon. We saw my mother and sister on Sunday afternoon - it was cordial...my mother/sister/me have never really had a great relationship. My mother has 2 daughters, one is her fav and its not me! @Sparky, so sorry your mom is such an ass, I dont like to do name-calling for ppl I dont know but based on what you said, I think I will make an exception! At least they show us a good role model...of what NOT to be!

Other than that, not much to tell. We went for the anatomy scan last week, all went well, our baby is still a little girl and she is growing beautifully. We were comfortable going with the 'girl' diagnosis after the first doc said it was a girl, this was now the 3rd one, maybe it will sink in now

How is everyone else doing? @Reese - really hoping things settle a bit with you and hubby dearest, sorry for all the stress you are going through
@Sparky - when is your next doc visit?
@Chanti - think you went for your anatomy scan a couple of weeks ago, any further news from you?
@Jay-bee - long time hun, how are you? your bean doing OK?
@Salemein - how are you doing? your little girl growing nicely still?

Anyway, hope everyone is doing well otherwise, take care

that moment when you type a reply and it goes missing......

@Sparky - Well done on being active! That is impressive! I am like a couch potato Yay for a nice bump and feeling baby! I have lots of movement and even watch my tummy move around but still no popping of the bump yet, still the chubby look! That's so nice that your MIL is getting you so many lovely things and I am so sorry to hear about your relationship with your mom, I can't imagine what that must be like! I can't believe she would totally avoid you in the mall, I was shocked to read that. Im really sorry and I pray things work out between the two of you xx

@Carien - It sounds like you had a nice weekend, I saw the pic of the gates open and I thought the same thing, if a person ends up in there you are a goner for sure! Terrifying stuff... And you definitely would be bigger for your third! Don't be hard on yourself!

@Reese - Oh dear hun.... It sounds like you are having a rough time.I can honestly see both sides on this though, I get the same with some things, I get frustrated and want something new and get upset with hubby if we can't just get it new but after a while I realise hey... sometimes its not worth the difference in price and I can imagine he is very stressed about adding 2 more kids to the equation and how much they are going to cost. We have had to go through alot of things and have alot of disagreements as we prepare for baby and discuss what needs to be changed, what needs to be spent on and what can actually wait even though it would be nice to get it done. The only thing I have gotten new is my cloth nappies, everything else is second or third hand from friends and family and now when i look at the cost of schooling and future things, I laugh at how insignificant some of these baby items are. I am really pleased your folks have gotten you the camp cots, perhaps don't say anything to hubby and just be surprised when your mom does the nursery and they "appear". Men can be really hard arsed about things when it comes to finances, they let their pride get in the way and there is absolutely nothing wrong with accepting things from other people, that is what friends and family are for! So try your best not to get too stressed about some of these things now as they have a way of working out on their own and your health is more important and you don't want to be stressing!! I;m so happy to hear that the girls are doing well, what a blessing that is! Praying they stay inside until you are due xxx