Jan/Feb 2011 Mommies (Nov & Dec 2010 early babes)

Mandz she art here, though all that happy dancing i did with you triggered another attack

Vix, chris, your hubby and the pead are all right in waiting. but there is no right or wrong. with regards to adjustment the "normal period" in adults is 3 months, with children its 6-8months, with the younger the child the more time given to adjust given their cognitive limitations (full extent of understanding and consequences etc). children's medium of language is their behaviour, if something is amiss they act up etc. so with regards to therapy, C would generally have play, art or any projective therapy. most 2 year olds cannot sit down and have a talking session - how good is C with emotional expression - can he convey his feelings? the therapist would also include some age appropriate supportive therapy, for example tell him a story about a girl having younger siblings and how that girl felt etc. she would in that way be validating his feelings, that the ouch girl was sad as mummy would be busy with the baby. the therapist would suggest that you spend time alone with him, create more opportunities to touch him, ruffle his hair when walking past, hug him when he is next to you etc. create a space for you to hold him while he sees dad hold the twins etc. Not always to have you hold th twins and dad hold him. you can do all the above suggestions now if you are not doing them anyway. the older the child the better the prognosis of the therapy. so there is no harm in waiting. rejection of a parent post the birth of a sibling is a common occurrence in older siblings 3 years and under.

i would start worrying if his behaviour gets any worse - regression, progresses to hitting them or does not start remitting after 6-8 months, then would suggest taking him to a therapist. if he evers tells you that he is angry, reflect back you are angry, why is C angry etc. as i asked how good is he at communicating/what is the extent of his vocabulary? i cant rem if ive answered all your questions? if you have any more that i can help answering let me know i can give you my number

Yvette she is just so in love with that Praying mantis About the birth control, I agree that if you have completed your family then for hubby to go for V is the best option. Its way easier for them. You have your 3 kiddies now, do you think you will want a forth? If you doubt then maybe a V is not a good idea. I was on the mini pill while I was BF, I didnt really like it much it affected me in ways other pills havent. I went back on Diane after the minipill, and its been month one and voila I have a period. I must admit I wasnt on anything prior to Jordyn-and it took us 2 years to fall pregnant(I wonder if this is a worry). So I am not really happy about being on the pill, but I would rather not fall pregnant right now. And I would be too scared to tempt fate. So I think its definitely something you need to be sure about, rather discuss in detail and if you are sure you wont need a reversal(since I think there is a chance this could fail) then get hubby to go for the snip

ashley with a praying mantis...

hi girls.

i asked/begged DH to get a vasectomy a few days ago. i am petrified to get preg again and DO NOT WANT 3 smal kids. i googled at vasectomy reversal and it costs about R25000-r35000. shoo. but what happens if i change my mind in a few years? i don;t want a TL at all because the reversal is more difficult than a V. what are all you guys doing about birth control? DH went to the urologist a few yrs back to have count done and apparently craig has the highest count the Dr has ever seen. i am also very fertile so we are not very safe! i take the minipill now becasue i am BF. but last year, i fell preg in that transition from minipill back to normal pill. grrr. work will be very unhappy. i am in corporate business and they only pay for 2 maternity leaves (which i have had now) and i have to work back a year to pay off the maternity leave. i am only free to leave my company from may next year....

vix - how are you? have you seen a therpaist yet?very sorry that C is giving you a hard time. must be heartbreaking for you.

chris - hows your gorgeous kiddies?

carmen - M is BEAUTIFUL! wow very pretty. well done on the BF!

ster - how is inge? she is at creche now hey?

mina - how are you friend?

suhaila - whenare you planning #2?

twinbee - yes, my emily is a big girl! very tall. she was 2.8kg at birth!

mandz - sorry about the AF discomfort. i have not had mine yet... and i hope it will be fine.

mommy - howare you feeling these days? did you your doctor? how is sarah?

Hi, maryke thinking of you and your family. Suhaila, i do hail from the superior province - from a small town nl glencoe BUT i live in jhb these days. However, i would move back to my natal with an hour's notice. Mandz- many reasons why i don't prac anymore- rural medicine was my first love and i worked in hammanskraal but unfortunately felt my life was at risk at times, also little to no integrity in public healthcare- most healthworkers want to do as little ar possible etc etc. Oh suhaila if only the wards were the way you described! Vix i think your babies are amazing- they are 2.75 and 3times their bw- most babes only double or triple their bw by 6months. I also think give c time-its prob just a normal share-its a huge shock to an only child to have to share his mother c two wiggly worms. Everyone else have a lovely d!

Hi all
Maryke so sorry, will keep you and your family in my thoughts at this difficult and trying time.

Binks Mishka has also refused the dummy, pushes it out with her tongue, she uses me to pacify instead.

Mishka only went to sleep at 11h30 last. I put her down to sleep at 7 she was down for about half an hour and awake again, this happened twice threafter!

Vix hope C gets over it soon. Hope the boys snotty noses clear up.

Ster and Vix - shocking to hear this about Netcare casualty!

Suhaila- sorry about the ashmatic attack, glad your better.

Mands - Mishka is also so alert at the 4am feed, glad you had someone the take it for you. Sorry about the AF pain.

Maryke- Thoughts are with you at this difficult time There is no easy way to handle it, just remember all the good times..I hope he is comfortable

Vix-I am sure C will come to terms with sharing you, though I have seen this with my DH nephew when his little sister arrived. I guess its to be understood, but he will come around. Especially since you are including him and not pushing him, he just need to realise that..But I think from a professional's point of view lets hear what Suhaila says!!! Where art she?

How is everyone else today?

I had a horrible night, was in so much pain from AF-did any of you experience this after your first AF since being pregnant? I have never had such backache etc! So I feel rather "grumpy"

Jordyn is fine, just woke for a feed at 2.30am- I tried to just give him his dummy-but when my hand went past his mouth he grabbed it like it was his bottle and wanted to devour it! Shame then after his feed he thought since we are headed for 4am and he had slept since 6pm that maybe just he could wake up like then!!! My mom is still here as MIL isnt back from NZ yet to look after J during the day, so since she is such an early bird-she jumped at the chance to have an awake, smiley Jordyn to start her day....yes at 4am!