Anyone else trying for a 2014 baby?

Its odd how one's mind handles statistics.

1 out of 4 pregnancies will miscarry... not brilliant odds, but it is still such a shock when the 1 in 4 happens to be you.
Now, because of my age i have a ~1:250 chance of having a downs baby.... FAR less chance than the 1 in 4 above, yet im obsessing about this!
Its completely crazy... before i had my miscarriage I didnt even consider the 1:4 risk of miscarrying but stressed about the 1:250 risk of downs.

I guess its just not easy to think rationally when the implications of these odds are so long lasting and potentially life altering. actually its not easy to think rationally about anything when you're either saturated with all the temps/info/obsession that comes with TTC or, later on, battling a deluge of pregnancy hormones.

Im sure Im going to look back on this time of my life and wonder why I was so worried all the time.

Sterretjie - Not to sound negative or wanting to discourage us, but you are saying is true about the amount of pregnancies ending before 12 weeks. Until it hasn't happened to you (or you have done some research) most women don't realise that it is very normal for a lot of pregnancies to end in MC before the 12 week mark. I guess that is why so many women prefer to wait to tell people about the pregnancy until then.

I guess this is why I hesitated for so long to start trying for a second child. When you sign up for your "roller coaster ride" you give up most control and must accept what the ride brings, good and bad. For me this has been difficult, letting go and taking the risk of what may come. However for myself I choose to have lived even if this means that heart ache might happen along the way. However Some days I feel as if I should just stop TTC because of the uncertainty of this journey, especially with the threat of having another ectopic pregnancy.

But, I still believe the chances of having a good normal pregnancy is still higher. Therefore counting the days till ovulation!!

Baby dust to all. xx

Hi Juno

I started bleeding at 5 weeks 3 days - clots but no cramps (SORRY TMI). That was a Sunday, I googled every possible option and a lot of info indicated that you can bleed while pregnant etc. From the Monday my breast were no longer tender and strange I just had a feeling that it was over but a little bit of me still hoped that I might be wrong. The Wednesday evening I did another pregnancy test and it was a big negative. The following Tuesday I had an appointment with my dr and he confirmed the MC. He suggested that I go for another HCG and the results came back as 0.5 hence the reason why no D&C was performed.

The strange thing was that I was worried from the start about a tube pregnancy and when we went to the dr at 5 weeks he told us that 1 out of 4 ladies that he sees per day ends up having a MC. I still walked out of his room that day and I said to DH that he never told us these statistics when we were pregnant with Inge.

I just heard that a lady working at work lost her baby at 17 weeks - heart breaking!!!!

Stay strong and we are here for one another!!!! one of these days we will have our second child!!!!!

You are all such a comfort..

Sterretjie what was the sequence of events with your MC?

Well my bloods are sitting on 773 so let's see what happens on Friday. My doc will be satisfied if it is 100 or below.

Sorry Juno

Hi Ladies

Juno, so sorry to hear. It is such a "crappy" thing to happen (sorry for the French). I still look at the calendar and think that I should have been almost 11 weeks pregnant. And as Justine says the shock / sadness / disappointment does take a while to go away. Then you see pregnant ladies that complain about sore backs etc and I think "I wish I could be pregnant as I would do anything to be pregnant" but then at least I have my daughter.

Hope you don't have to go for a D&C - I also went for bloods after my MC and it was 0.5 so the dr said that it wasn't necessary.
*****Hugs******

Juno, Im so sorry to hear your news. i remember the feelings of shock/sadness/disappointment all wrapped into one. and you're right... its not helped if you have to walk past newborns. actually the only thing that pulled me out of my depression after it happened to me was my first born. i found it impossible to wallow in grief with that sunny little face staring at me.
I hope that your child (and all the other real-life support you have around) help you to feel a bit better too.
*hug*