When does dicipline start?

I am waiting for my book to come in the post....till the end of the month...take2 was much cheaper with "between parent and child" and the new jamie oliver book...so we have to wait till the end of the month!!!

Doesn't "somebody" want to write a review about "between parent and child" nudge, nudge, wink, wink??

It seems a lot of parents struggle with this dicipline thing, I think we need all the resources available.

Yes it is. It may take me a month or two as I am super busy so only managing a couple pages per night, but will loan it as soon as I am done.

Julz - Is Between Parent and Child your book? If it is, would you mind lending it to me when you are finished?

I have heard good things about it.

Distraction when they are young is a great. When they are older it gets more tricky.

For smacking mommy and scratching etc I have been told by a couple of pros to take the hand and say NO and then to say I don't like it when you hit/scratch/bite me or it hurts mommy when you xyz....

I have started reading the book Between parent and child and it is really amazing. Honestly very helpful with great senarios and Neil and I chuckle together. It basically shows you the less ideal method of handling a situation followed by a better way.

Brilliant.

I think from watching my nephew (now 6) & my niece (now 22 months) & how my sisters/family have raised them, its better from an early age.
Iv realised, even with my baby (8 months) that even though he may not know the meaning of hayi (no) he understands that Im not happy from my tone. In the beginning he wld look at me, do it again, I say hayi again, then he would come to me whimpering for a hug!! These days he ignores me though, he will literally look at me square in the eyes & carry on with whatever Im saying no to. When I go to remove him, he cries even before I reach him coz he knows Im gonna take him away & put him some place else.
Then he stubbornly crawls back to where I removed him from or he throws a tantrum, crying & throwing his body backwards.
So he obviously understands & he's starting to test boundaries.
Im pretty consistant though & the nanny also is, so now he automatically dsnt go to the restricted areas when he can see we are looking. He does go though if he thinks we not looking.

He also scratches, pulls my hair, hits my chest & bites my face. He's not being aggressive though, he's being playful.
What Iv learned with him though is if he pulls my hair & slobbers all over my face, bites me, its either he's tired or hungry. If I dnt do anything bout it, he'll starts crying.
Sometimes he just scratches me, but there really is no aggression involved

My thoughts here are to start as early as possible.

Obviously a small baby is not going to be spray painting graffiti on the neighbours wall, but is going to hit or scratch or maybe spit.

As Kristin said moving or distracting the child is one method, but also taking their hand firmly, to stop the scratching/hitting and saying "NO" in a firm voice also helps.

I think it is very hard to say "okay, today we will start with discipline" - it is easier to have an idea of what is acceptable behaviour and what isn't and to keep insisting on the acceptable behaviour.

We are "stricter" with rules and what is acceptable in comparison to what I see as the 'norm' - I have no idea if we have well behaved kids or not.

However we often socialise with friends who have no kids, so often take our 3 where there are only adults, and no kids.

So we try and "socialise" our kids so we can take them to a place without having to apologise profusely and leave early because they are causing a fuss.

We work hard to keep a consistent message with our kids - and are very clear about what is acceptable and what is not.

I do sometimes feel we are stricter on our kids than we could be, or than what society dictates - and we are constantly reminding them what is permitted and what is not - so that we hope when we are not there they understand the line.

I do think it is better to start at an early age, for consistency.

<Kristin - you can act as an impartial judge when you meet my brood - it will be past 5pm, they will be well into that hell hour, so you should be seeing them at their worst. Then you give me some honest feedback as to what you think. I obviously have a perception of how my kids behave, but mommy eyes are always wearing rose-coloured glasses.>

They dont need much when they are babies...I think a strong NO and then removing from the place where she is being naughty. I really started disciplining Daniel when he was over a year. We do believe in smacking(one must do what works for your family) and I would give a small tap on the hand...that always helped. Now that he is over 2 he gets a smack on his bottom if he goes against us. You know what book really helped us. Raising boys from James Dobson, and now he has a Raising girls our as well...

I tell you it is very important. One does not always feel like it, as you are tired, sometimes it is easier to just let them do it...right. But I have a friend whose boy is 2 and a half now. She took the no discipline route, and I overheard her complain to another friend how out of control he is and how she does not know how to deal with him...what a pity....discipline, which ever way you decide to take is very important. And love..it gives them the assurance that you love them.