The fine print on the Mommy contract

Oh, did I forget to mention that we live in GP and the familes in CPT We have meddling families, both sides. It's easier to deal with them here than there

Joshua is 15months, and I think I'm finally ready to start therapy. This is how it went down, won't even go into family history and childhood, etc

15 Sept - DH starts new job
1 Oct - Joshua is born
Then baby makes three and all the frills and anxieties creep in, You know all the other baby stuff that no one tells you (cos they never tell you how difficult it'll be)
5 March 2010 - Dh complains that he's getting flu
8 March - DH stops smoking and still complains about flu, so he goes to Gp. Diagnosis - bronchitis, solution - antibiotics
10 March - after I nagged thathe's not getting better, back to Gp
I get a call from GP telling me to come home that I need to take my Dh to hospital as he's lungs are going to collapse.
In hopsital, lots of docs that don't know wha's happening. They do Ct scans, blood tests etc
12 March - Dh in theatre, lung biopsy, and something else wrong with trachea. Comes out of surgery, only for me to notice that he's got apipe sticking out his neck, Doc says that if he's heart stops they can pump adrenalin straight into heart thru it. So, he's heart stopped in theatre.
Recovery in ICU, very bad recovery. Traumatic for all of us as well as J who was 5 months then. Then J decides to stop BF. So I gove expressed milk in between the hospital visits. Just got back to work from ML and now had to stay away as my DH was DYING! So, discharged on Sunday 21 March at 10am, with lots of instructions from Docs. Only to be re-admitted on Monday 22 MArch at 2am! Did i forget to metion that he developed blood clots which broke free and wnet thru his heart.

Anyhow, now still recovering, Joshua is doing great and so too is DH, we know that we have a long raod to full recovery. Final diagnosis - Pulmory Sarcoidosis, Pulmonary Emboli, and now chronic asthma.

Just need to vent befor e I start looking for a trheapist. And I can now say without any guilt that I need a time out!

Here is the fine print to having more than one ....

No one gives a flying fek.

First baby you are hailed as the Mother Mary, and people offer you chairs to sit in, you get to sleep on Saturday afternoons, and it is all about you and how you are feeling, and and and ..... you feel like a princess on a pedastal and you are about the birth the messiah.

Second baby, no one really cares about you so much. No time to sleep, no one tries to help you, and now you are lugging a 10 - 25kg 1st mite on your hip.

There is no time to complain, but you feel worse than sh*t warmed up. You are not sleeping because you are still caring for baby #1, and well it is all pretty tragic.

And at some point usually at 11pm, as you are sitting in a hot bath to try and relieve the pressure on your belly, and to try and reduce your aching back, and just so you can just sit quietly you wonder why no-one is treating you like a princess!! Probably because you look a bit like Morticia.

Third baby, do not even get me started! While juggling baby 2, covering books of baby 1, and plowing the field, you are squeezing a baby from your uterus, and at about this point if you hear one person with one baby go "I can't do that I have a baby!" you actually sh&t yourself - but you do not have time to do washing, so you just do a little streak, and still just wear the dirty underwear.

After that, you sort of let the wolves raise them, as you attempt to drink your half cold cup of tea and eat your three-day old croissant.

Amen to that Julz!

Someoene once said that the cute moments just makes it all worthwhile

Hapi you may have two exceptional babies. who knows. Don't you just hate it when people make you feel bad. Just because you struggled to have a baby doesn't mean that you are no longer human. It doesn't make the back ache less painful or the baby cry less.

But I have to share. I am not religious at all so he must have learned this at school, but yesterday at dinner time my son put his little hands together, closed his eyes and sang Thank you father.



This is what it is all about!!!!

Oh yes, the daddy likes to play with baby but when baby cries they handover the child to mommy to sort out. WTF? I'm also new at this parenting business. Also, other family members do it especially my mom & MIL. I can truly say that I have grown a spine, after 8months for taking their crap. I coul dlook at them, make sure that my child was not too distressed and say "Deal with it, you caused it!" and walk away

Julz, I remember those bad days...
I also remember putting J in the cot and sitting outside waiting for Dh to pull into that driveway from work. He didn't dare tell me that he's been at work all day and he's tired That rock woul dhave been bashed for sure

Parenting is not easy and we learn everyday. We learn through our mistakes and by trial & error.

Big up to all the single parents but I won't be able to do thi son my own.

oh Ladies ... I love you all so much for starting this thread.

Interesting how 2 nights ago I was in tears telling DH that we are not doing this EVER again as I cant go through this again, the constant nausea and being sick is not at all what i thought pregnancy will be about.

Mind you, im only 11 weeks pregnant and I remember the delighted and excited look on my mother's face when I told her that we are pregnant - that quickly turned into a look of horror when I told her that its twins. She told me that i was a colicky baby and that she really hopes and prays none of the twinnies takes after me as that was one of the most difficult times in her life.

She then started telling me all these stories and the meltdowns that she had and i quickly realised that we are in for a very bumpy ride.

Everyone is telling me to shut up and be greatful that I have been blessed with two at a go and I am. But the logical and practical side of me is telling me that the road ahead is going to be very long.

:sigh:

One thing I have discovered from getting past the sleep deprivation is that everything seems worse when you are sleep deprived. I can honestly say that Neil was actually great during those early months.

Sure he didn't feature at night, but he also had to get up and go to work etc. Dylan slept more than I thought he had. He didn't cry as much as I thought he had either. I can say that now, but when I was so sleep deprived that they wanted to put me into hospital, everything seemed 1000000000 times worse.

Oh and true . He really encouraged me to breast feed for as long as possible. Now I understand why. He wouldn't have to do feeds then. Clever!!!!

I remember times when I had to wake Neil up to get Dylan out of the carry cot next to me because I was so tried I couldn't physically move my arms or legs. Bad days those.


I honestly don't know how single parents do it! Neil is my rock. Sure I wanted to bash the rock on the head many nights. I wanted to shoot him when he made Dylan cry in the cot at 2 weeks of age because he thought Dylan was being Naughty, but he is the best dad and helps so much.