Born Oct/Nov 2015

Oh my goodness!!! Look at that smile!!!!!!!!

And then they say babies only smile from 1 month onwards....

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Hi all

Before anything else - Zandri, I think it's normal to feel guilty, BUT you did everything you could to do what was best for Stephan. While there are some indications that there are certain things which may protect you from preeclampsia, I don't think that there is any proven way to prevent it. You most certainly didn't ask for it and the most important thing right now is that you keep yourself strong and are there for your little miracle. As far as your mom's comments go - survival rate at even 26 weeks is between 80 and 90% and Stephan was still baking at the 98% survival time so I hope that that provides you with some reassurance. Your mom was not being helpful at all to say that. Will Kloof let you do kangaroo care with him when you're there? It's supposed to be amazingly good for them. As Louise said, we're ALL thinking of and praying for you and your family.

As far as the "falling in love" side of things goes, thank you all for sharing. I'd read about moms saying that it didn't come straight away, but I was so sure it would because of how much I loved her before she was born. And my own mom always said it was instant. So it really bothered me. And the fact that DH was all in - hook, line and sinker from the very first glimpse. This is what he said:



I am so overjoyed that he is so in love, but it made me feel inadequate. Gosh! It's difficult being a woman. Either way, we're getting there. It really is such an emotional rollercoaster.

As far as healing and recovery, I'm getting there. I miss the side bars of the hospital bed (and the remote to raise and drop the head of the bed!), but I'm propping myself up and have discovered that bending my legs and grabbing my knee to support myself makes lifting my upper body much easier. The nurse that did her bilirubin test yesterday commented that I'm quite "tough" because I was crouched down over my bag looking for something and she was writing in details for her records when she got to the "natural or Caesar" question. When I answered her she said "you're bent over like that with a wound?!". So that made me feel quite good.

Last night was rough. Both DH and I had only had about 3 hours of sleep on Thursday night so our nerves were fraying quite easily and I was half resentful and half grateful when he fell asleep. Either way, got through to this morning and got El to sleep around 7 again and I had a cat nap before getting her down again at 11 and sleeping until 1pm while dad kept an eye on her. So I eventually got about 6 hours or so. Breastfeeding is going well, but it seems like she's needing both boobs at this point. I think she's draining one side and then needing more so I'm upping the Brewers yeast. Haven't really got engorged, a bit more volume and leaking though.

I did actually get a bag from the hospital, so got some more samples and things (similar stuff to the Dischem bag inside). Just a bit annoying when they could give it before to make packing for hospital easier, but hey, you can never have too much of some things!! And as far as hospital bags go, I didn't even use the vests!! Today was the first day that she's wearing one and it's just because her onesies were dirty and I figured it's warm enough just to wear a body vest today (and easier to check the nappy!)

PND is no joke! I'm hoping I stay strong, haven't had uncontrollable crying and that yet from the hormone drop, but it really isn't something to take lightly. Antenatal midwife said that she knows of or knew a mom that hung herself and another one who left her baby on a blanket in her garage (like you would a puppy) and went out. The baby was thankfully found because the maid was working next door and went to check on what was happening because she heard crying and had keys for the house.

Right now daddy has El asleep on his lap while he watches the rugby. Looks like it'll be a tight game.

And here are some more pics







Any news of Candypops? Still wonder about Leewe @kimmy and Juanita - so close! Exciting!
@Louise - yip, as Kimmy said, no difference

, louise, no difference there at all!

@juanita, am having jitters now, i just phoned a friend that's based i durban and cried and cried , felt silly after that though, i was just thinking of leaving my boy for few days, and how will he adjust from being the centre of attention to sharing the limelight

Hahahaha!!! Took the photo of my belly this morning and just had to do the comparison...

:D:D

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@kimmy, are you ready for Friday?? Our last weekend with only one brat-o-saurus and mine is refusing to come home!!! She is insisting on sleeping at oumies another night.

Zandri how has your day been with you lb??

Thinking of you Zandri <3 Don't lose faith. Sending lots of love!


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