New Moms get a raw deal from not-so-new-moms ....

Are you going a little crazy - or have you posted this in the wrong thead? Because I am having a "what is she on about" moment.

A bit annoyed myself now and I deleted my rant, however let me just say this: I think it is wonderful that we share what works for us. It really is and it may help others, but a cure all for one child is not always a cure all for others and often when you read a book about the perfect colic cure, mom's like me are left feeling a tad pathetic that we couldn't "fix" our babies.

mutha2b - maybe by raising this exact subject with her.

Explain to her how you have noticed that new moms get a rough deal from not-so-new moms and not-so-new moms are often judgemental on new moms and it makes it difficult for new moms who are already struggling.

What does she think?

It might be an interesting spring board to a discussion and you can get her feelings on it, and based on that you might indicate to her that you feel that she judges you and it makes you feel slightly less than happy.

I think not-so-new moms do not always mean to judge and be snarky but I think they/we/I sometimes do not realise they/I am doing it - and if someone told me/her, that might help her and you to have a better relationship going forward.

Since beginning this thread I am much more aware of how I speak to my new-mom friends and I try to be more aware of what I am saying and how I am coming across to them.

What i hate the most is when they (not so new moms) tell you something in a Condescending manner.......

My friend said something about my baby not holding properly for her age but frowned and pulled her face as she was saying these things.
I got really mad because she thinks she is miss-know-it-all.

I hate it when she visits my house because i know, i will be judged. Funny thing is that i get upset but i have never said anything. I take it out on my husband (he just pointed that out to me, i didn't realise).

How do i tell her to back off?

Also Hannelie,andthen Riana from Naboomspruit. Shealso has twins.

NeliaSmit wrote:

Yes, I did, when the twins were small. I still have contact with some of the moms. I assume you did too?

Hannelie Think she was Kaapsegirl on BK and she is a very old friend of mine from before BK & Shimone who I still have very good contact with. None of the others though. You?

I have to admit that for me, the BF was not wanting to do it to not feel guilty. I wanted to do it because I thought it would be easier on myself and Matt would get the best nutrition. When things starting showing signs of not working out, I did not perservere with the thoughts of "People will judge me if I dont try harder". I honestly was just quite stubborn and determined to get it right for ME