September / October / November mommys 2012

Think I hold the record for longest post!
But it's because Kaylee doesnt let me near the pc during the day lol!

I am sitting with a cold
Slight fever, and a very blocked nose.
I'm so reluctant to even take panado's for it, and using salex rinse but it doesnt keep my nose open at night and so I hardly slept last night
Very ironic that the first night since returning home from the hospital K slept through, and I woke up a number of times cos of my nose, and needing to wee!

I'm still waiting not so patiently for news of the shortlisting I'm on.
Really hope they will let me know soon, cos I dont do well with waiting and could really use the good news! It's sometimes hard to trust that things work out but I am really trying.

Evening ladies!

Congrats Mutha2b! Sometimes surprises work out for the best! And I am super jealous about your lack of MS!!!

And YES, my toddler is super dependent on me at the moment. She is at home with me at the moment and it is quite exhausting if I'm honest. But it is also their age, and their neediness is part of how they show they love us.
Where do you live?

Mrs SH I am mostly trained in Bookkeeping to Trial Balance level so largely the type of position I'm applying for. But I have also done trading which I thoroughly enjoyed. So involved sales and procurement. But experience is specific to industry so makes it hard to find work in this area.

How was your gynae visit today??? Really hope all is fine with you! Keep us posted.
Yea I've also heard that statistic about inductions leading to c/secs. I think largely its cos baby isn't ready to come at the time of the induction.

Elamsmom so glad your public speaking is over, sounds rather hectic! What do you do?

Mrs SH to answer your question.
Kaylee was born with 5 congenital heart defects. Some of them are interrelated so part of the same defect I would say. She had surgery at 8 days old to correct a narrowing in her aorta (called Coarctation of Aorta). She has some complexities in the surrounding valves so they couldnt resect the valve and instead inserted a patch to open the valve up. But because of her size, and how much they grow in the beginning, at 6 months they had to go back in to redo it. Luckily this time they could do the resection because there was more space. So far it looks like this is dealt with for life praise God. But as a result of the abnormally shaped aorta the blood flow through there isn't smooth and causes blood to rush against the valve and not through it in a smooth motion.
So in September they found this had caused corrosion on the inside of the heart wall where the blood was pushing away at the valve. The pressure was considered moderate and told to go back in 6 months for a check up. I brought the check up forward by 2 months because I wasn't comfortable with the wait, and I was unemployed and thought if she needed surgery it would be a good time to be able to care for her post op. So we went to see the cardiologist on the 17th of Jan and discovered that the pressure was now severe and needed intervention or we would risk irreparable damage to the aortic valve which would require valve replacement, which in a toddler is really not something we want to do as they still have so much growing to do and could result in further replacements down the line.
So on Friday 17th February, exactly one year to the day since her previous surgery, she had open heart surgery to cut away the scar tissue.
She did amazingly well, and was extubated by the Saturday afternoon. She was out of ICU by the Monday afternoon and we came home last week Wednesday afternoon.
We had a heart echo before leaving the hospital and the cardiologist is very pleased and very hopeful that it wont recurr - there is generally a 20% chance of recurrance because the shape of the valve isn't changed.
She also has a bicuspid aortic valve - 2 leaflets that pump the blood to the body instead of 3. So it means it works harder to do the same job, and gets 'old' quicker, and because of the shape means not the entire valve is pumping. So she will need aortic valve replacement at some point in her life. Some people go on into old age before this happens, but it all depends on the pressure and scar tissue that builds.
So we still have a long journey ahead but at least for the short term future she is heart healthy and we can relax a little bit.

Needless to say I am kind of stressed second time round. Because we only found out when she was 4 days old we had no idea before then. But this time we are wiser, and realise that these conditions can sometimes be genetic and that she was still fairly lucky in terms of the extent of the problems, but if this baby has the same, it could be worse.
But I'm trying not to let it get to me, and trusting and hoping and praying that this baby will be healthy!

So thats my story and thats why I've been referring to the hospital stay, and staying at home with K. I'll have to stay with her till the end of next week, and then hopefully I find work and she is okay to go back to daycare. She really misses the kiddies but she still has an open wound and rib cage that has to grow back together which can take 4-6 weeks and cant risk being pushed on her chest by other kids.

Hi ladies,

Wow!! Congrats to all the bfp!!!!!
I am due on 12th September 2012. Same day as our anniversary and my husband's birthday.

I am not as excited as I was with my little girl. I guess it's probable because we had not planned another one this year but end of next year. But nonetheless, I am praying for a healthy problem free pregnancy and birth!
Oh, no MS for me this time around YAY!!!!

Oh, does anyone have a toddler that is suddenly so dependent on them? My girl will not even walk two steps and cries for me to pick her up. She just cries all the time and throws tantrums.....happy days

@ Joybaby - what do you do? When are you going for the final interview?

@ Elamsmom - jip, moms know in their heart of hearts whether something is going to work and and when it isn't.

Before Theresa (our nanny) I went through an agency to find a nanny. We trialled someone for 2 days and I just knew it wasn't going to work out. She wasn't what I wanted - she wasn't motherly. And you can't teach someone that.

Flip man - another 1.5hours before my visit! It's the longest day in the history of the world!!

@ Joybaby - sorry if I missed it, but why did K have an operation? What happened? I also don't want an emergency c-sect, hence I'll never opt for induction. Did you know that 70% of inductions end up in c-sects?

My dad is a gyneacologist. Yes, for my sins. No, I don't, never have and never will go to him, but he is a great source of information. I hate it when people generalise about gyneas forcing people into anything - I guess I only have him and my gynea to go on and neither of them ever forced me into anything. At the end of the day, they just want to ensure that the mom and baby are fine when birth happens. And as far as what is medically possible, try to give the mom what she wants.

In my opinion, why does it matter how the baby came out if everyone is healthy? Honestly, I don't get it. But I respect people and their opinions and feelings. I just don't get the whole obsession over which is better / preferred / frowned upon / didn't get the experience...

Hey ladies. happy Tuesday! Wish this week would hurry up & be over already, then the next 30 weeks as well so I can meet my baba

So, we had this public speaking thing at work where for the past 3 Mondays, we had to do speeches on different topics etc to imprive our presentation skills blah bla frkn blah. So, having it on Mondays meant that the last few weekends have been spent stressing about these frkn speeches. Last night was the last one! Hooooray!!! Cheers to speech-free weekends!!!

Anyway, now that I've had my little rant , I was just looking at newborn baby photo shoots on Cilla Bloom photography. I shouldn't have! Now I just can't wait to meet my little baby! 7 months seems like a lifetime away. Ofcourse all I see is the cuteness & squishyness & adorableness & I'm conveniently forgetting all about the hard work & sleepless nights & exhaustion

Anyway, I've just eaten all of my lunch was feeling like something savoury. @Joybaby, I'm also really into the savoury stuff lately. Have provita's with cheese and all sorts of other crackers at my desk. I find it helps with the nausea.

Anyway, the new helper who arrived yesterday from PE? I'm firing her today. hard to explain. She's just not going to work for me. AT ALL. We just don't gel. And she doesn't gel with my child. Some ppl might say i am being hasty, but as a mother, you don't need a week or a month to get a "feeling" about someone. So, I'm sending her back to PE today & have a new helper starting on thursday. Luckily I had interviewed quite a few so I do have options. I hate having to let people go. I'm very bad at such things.

Hey everyone!
I can see I'm going to struggle to keep up with the busy chatter! I am at home fulltime while I search for employment, and help K with her recovery, but she owns the computer or so she thinks. Doesnt give me any change to type on moomie.

I also am a huge chatter - and dont ask me to do short hand cos I just cannot! So hopefully you'll get used to that

Mrs S H we are around the corner from each other then. I'm in Kraaifontein, but 'from' Durbanville.

Your story sounds totally reasonable and I'm very glad your c sec experience on the whole was a positive one. You know exactly what's right for you and as you say you have family history of late c/section anyway. It's awesome your gynae allowed you to walk that long.

I also had a c/sec which was 'elective'. It became elective at 36 weeks, because up till then I was hoping for natural. But K still wasnt turning. She was always head up, never ever showed any signs of turning. And at the 36 week scan her growth was slowing down, she was 2 weeks behind size in due date and signs of low amniotic fluid. So doc didn't want to take a chance to wait it out, so we had our csec at 38w3d. Her chord was also twice around her neck and he told us she would never have turned.
The actual c/sec was fine for me. I think I must've had a very good anaethetist. DH says he was hard at work keeping everything stable which really freaked him out, but I had no clue to any of this. The spinal was totally fine, and the first day you have a drip and cant move anyway, plus I was numb till early evening.
I managed to breastfeed within an hour of her birth, and she latched beautifully.
But day 2 - 10 were absolutely hell for me.
The stitch caught a nerve which was constantly pulling and I was in utter pain. Because of this, day 2 I was pretty much in bed. Day 3 I 'had to' get up, tried to take a shower but it was unbearable. Synape Forte was my favourite friend.
I only had the stitches removed on day 10, and had spent 3 days prior to that standing next to my daughters hospital bed in SICU.
But once the stitch was removed I had immediate relief and the recovery was then effortless.

I would really like to try for Vbac this time, or at least walk till the very end before deciding on a c/sec. I would prefer natural to elective c/sec, but would prefer elective c/sec to emergency c/sec absolutely exhausted after 20 hours of labour.

Re eating - I am soooo into savoury foods at the moment. I normally have a huge sweet tooth but the last week all I want is savoury. I made myself and Kaylee Tuna Mate for lunch today. And making roast chicken for supper now.
I also gained 2 kilo's but that was cos of being in hospital last week and not having home made food to eat, and snacking unnecessarily.
I am already 30kgs over weight so I intend on not picking up any weight during pregnancy (fat chance!) and then losing a bit when baby is born.
I intend to do so healthily though. Will still eat well balanced meals, just skip the bad stuff. So not dieting per se but I certainly cannot afford to put on more wieght than I'd lose after birth. With K I picked up 18kgs but only lost 12. And I've never lost the rest in the last 18 months, in fact I picked up an extra 2
I already have quite a tummy from last time and so I already look 5 months pregnant Dont think I'll be 'showing' rather looking fat before 6 or 7 months. It's my own fault though!

MonicaR we have to increase our water intake and limit caffeine cos its a diaretic. I woke up twice last night to go to the loo and when I woke this morning I was bursting to go. I'm drinking loads of water at the moment, which isn't normal for me. Probably drinking 2-3Ltrs a day.
So I guess its that dehydration feeling thats making me drink so much more! Maybe the same for you?

Mrs S H I think u must take my CV and give it to HR I've applied for positions at Ackermans HQ a few times already but never a reply.
I am unemployed at the moment. Was retrenched 2 weeks prior to starting my maternity leave with K. They paid me a package that allowed me to stay home for 6 months. I got a contract 3 months later, which ended in January.
Now I'm back to looking for something permanent. I will probably not get maternity benefits, so will prob only be home for 6 weeks, and then half day 6 weeks and then fully back or something like this so that I can at least get some time at home.
I was short listed for a position in Bellville and went for my final interview on Friday.
I'm one of 2 shortlisted candidates so really praying they will choose me. Hoping to hear within the next couple of days since its nearly the end of the month.
It's really close to home which is bonus as petrol is so expensive!
Till now we've had someone to clean once a week, but we're giving her notice this week until our finances settle again. We are paying her too little in my mind in any case, hopefully she'll find someone who can pay better for more days.

Symptoms - been very tired, urinate a lot at night, and although not throwing up a definite hint of nausea that stays all day long. For now its bearable though!

Oh and my family and friends are starting to make predictions already.
3 say Boy, 1 says girl. But I think since I already have a girl people are more inclined to say a boy next.

Sheez, the day is dragging!! Tomorrow this time i'll be en route to the gynea! Yay!

Joybaby - I realised I never answered your question re birthing. I guess it's because I'm apathetic towards the whole thing. I would have preferred to have a natural birth first time round, but I was pleasantly surprised with the c-sect and won't mind either way this time.

What happened was that I walked until 40 weeks thinking that we would be going the natural route. When I went for my check up on week 40, Alex hadn't budged, my cervix was still completely shut. My gynea (old school - he NEVER pushed me into any decision and I completely and utterly believe him to this day) said that I would walk until at least 41 weeks and Alex still wouldn't have moved. Alex at that point was already 3.5kg. If I went another week, he would've been bigger. My max for natural was 3.5kg - I didn't want to push out anything bigger.

Anyway, I went to see they gynea on the Friday and he said that he could induce me, but he thought that it would end up in emergency c-sect anyway. So he said that I had the choice of coming in on Monday either for an induction or for a c-sect. I opted for the c-sect. (By the way, my mom has 4 children, all c-sect. She walked until 42 weeks with my brother, her water broke, but had to get a c-sect because baby didn't want to come naturally at all. Might be genetic in my case.)

I was so nervous about it, I've never had narcotics, nevermind an operation! So I was terrified.

But at the end of the day, I had a very pleasant experience. I absolutely hated the day of the c-sect (I reacted badly to the spinal and my heart rate dropped etc and that whole day they keep you in a drug-fuelled high with pain medication all the while you have to try and bond with your baby), but from day 2 onwards, I literally have zero complaints. I was up and about the minute they said I could, I didn't have any pain, I healed nicely and all in all it was a great experience. I had no trouble with breastfeeding or picking Alex up (my biggest concerns).

Also, Alex was born with the cord wrapped around his head twice, so it could have been very traumatic for him if I tried to push!

My preferred route this time would be exactly the same. Let me go until as close to 40 weeks as what the baby allows and let's make a decision then. If things look favourable for natural, I'll try it. If it doesn't, I'll have a c-sect. I honest to God don't mind.

I do not, however, want to pre-book my c-sect date. I don't want to have no surprises.

Anyway, that's my story. I hope that answered your question.

What's yours?